The remains of the leg

A while back I met one of my favorite people, Johnny V. Johnny and I did a “church tour” for about a year, we visited a different church every Sunday. One of the greatest parts of those experiences was the drive time where we got to chat quite a bit, and really learn a lot about each other. One of those conversations was about amputating my leg, and what I would like to do with the leg when I finally decide to do it. There was a bit of joking about a lamp or mounting it above the mantle. I had told him that there is actually a company out there that will turn cremated remains into a diamond.

Johnny remembered that conversation and while we are not turning it into a diamond he so graciously offered to pay for it to be cremated. He actually had to do a bit of work to find a place locally that would do it. After finding a place that would, everything got put into place and we are cremating the leg.

Today the funeral home called and needed me to come in and sign some papers to authorize it. Of course I put two and two together that the leg must be on the premises. I asked to see it and they let me!!! I was thinking ahead and brought my camera (no I am not posting pictures). Something so cool happened while I was “observing” my leg. I have just in the last few days started feeling the phantom pain, and when I starting touching the leg the pain went away and returned soon after leaving. I am of the belief that our earthly bodies are just temporary but there was definitely a connection that took place.

Now some may be thinking it morbid or sick to want to see my severed limb or for that matter keep the remains, but for me it was therapeutic. This visually and tangibly helped my mind to process that my leg is no longer a part of me.

Johnny thank you for what could possibly be the best gift I have ever received, I am indebted to you.



  1. That’s fantastic. Are you going to keep the ashes in an urn? Or maybe an old coffee can?

  2. we are, for right now we got an urn until we think of something else to do with them. There is a local glass blower that mixes in the ashes into the glass that we might do but we will wait for now. There is still alot more going on. In 7 weeks baby is due!!!

  3. Why does this not surprise me? After bonding with him in the very beginning of the Horse Brass Days (when females were still allowed if they were a Mom who picked up the tab), when Bob, Steve Black and Johnny were all in seminary together, I can absolutly see Johnny V. doing this for you, Tarver.

    Johnny V., in my book, you have always been and will always be, THE MAN!

    From my old nursing days and working with alot of Viet Nam Vets that were amputee’s, I remember alot about phantom pain, toes itching, etc. I am curious as to the possibility of decressing these events if you actually have something tangible to touch. Hum…


  4. It makes full-on sense to cremate said appendage since the rest of your insides (esophagus down to small intstine, and maybe even lower) are there to freak out every medical professional in the expanding universe. I vote for the blown glass.

  5. Oy, Soren and Helen say how-do (both laugh joyously at your current adventure).

  6. Pete, my thinking exactly. We got rid of it because of “burns” might as well be sure to complete the process

    Tell the Boy and Girl how-do from me, and Regina as well. I will try to jump on skype to have a chat soon.

  7. Johnny, don’t know who you are, but thank you for making such a generous gesture to Tarver. While I wish he was back in Omaha, it’s awesome knowing that he’s got great friends looking after him.

  8. Hey Tarver, the blown glass idea is cool, but I’m VERY curious as to the effect the ashes could have on the phantom pain? If, say, having a part of your leg still on your person- (on a necklace perhaps?)- a handy place where you could “rub” at the onset of the pain? Maybe it could be molded into a medallion, or put in a glass bulb of some sort-kinda like a mustard seed? It would be awesome if it would alleviate the pp! Wish we had ashes of David’s arm to try that. Love to you, Tara & Babe

  9. I will let you know, they make urn necklaces. I haven’t ordered one yet but intend to.

Comments RSS TrackBack Identifier URI

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s